Randomness in game, 2 dates vs. 1, why chasing is futile.

Well, I have to admit I’ve been spinning my wheels a bit lately because I haven’t had the time to run game and generate new leads.

I had a first date with a girl Tuesday and got her back to my place, panties off, bra and shirt off, on my bed, but LMR and ASD kicked in. I tried to roll off and do the other shit (talking dirty, putting her hand on my dick, etc.), but she wouldn’t go for it.

27+, so not totally surprised.

I should mention that when I say 27+, I really mean a woman who’s in that range between 27ish and 37ish. It does have an upper end of course, because at some point post wall, women get horny and desperate enough that they once again become receptive to a player (the problem for women then is that most just aren’t very good looking anymore). I don’t think there’s any way to put a specific age on that because some women give up fairly quickly on the notion of an LTR/marriage and some women hold on far longer than they should.

On that point I should say, I’ve found dating single moms almost entirely worthless. Hypothetically speaking, single moms should just want to bang and not worry about it, because most of them don’t have time to be in a serious monogamous relationship, but as we know, women don’t think rationally about sex and relationships. Anyway, I’ve banged a few since my red-pill awakening, but all three were firmly beyond the notion of re-marrying–or at least weren’t in that state of mind when they met me. But most single moms are looking for a beta provider, which means if you’re a player, they’re not going to bite.

I think this is extremely important: women see you as either a lover or provider, and they are seeking one or the other. It’s both conscious and unconscious, but what I’ve found is that because I come off as a player, women are either very attracted to me and interested, or attracted but not interested.

And if she’s in that latter category, there’s almost nothing you can do to flip the script–which is a point RedQuest made on one of his blogs.

Take my date Tuesday. My game was absolutely on point. Went to the wine bar, led her right from the beginning to sit on a couch, initiated kino almost immediately, kissed her within an hour; took her to another bar and continued to escalate and raise her buying temperature; convinced her to come back to my place; and finally, got most of her clothes off and was basically inches from getting my dick inside her.

It’s like when a pitcher throws a two-hitter, but gets no run support and the bullpen blows it… or I guess another analogy–which only guys who’ve fly fished would know–is that most of the time, the trout comes up and takes the fly, or doesn’t. And if he comes up seeming interested and refuses, 9/10 times you aren’t catching that fish. The advantage in fishing is that you can change flies–in game you are who you are, and she sees you how she sees you.

Same thing in poker, where maybe the randomness matches game: you can make the right move, play the hand perfectly, and get outdrawn.

Anyway, I digress. The point I’m trying to make is that sometimes you didn’t do anything wrong, didn’t make a bad move, and your texting was totally fine–the girl just wasn’t there to be had. Better to move on than overanalyze the situation.

I also want to remind guys who are reading that I’m a fucking baby when it comes to properly running game–at least in terms of time and practice.

Yes, I’ve studied the shit out of game, and I’ve applied it. My lay count in the last year is pretty fucking good: I’ve had several months where I’ve fucked three + new girls and a period where I was spinning plates and getting regular sex from two girls. I’ve had many, many first date lays, a few same day lays/pulls, and on one day in the past year I fucked two different girls on the same goddamn day–actually within 4 hours of each other.

But that said, I’m a baby. I’ve done less than 150 proper sets, weeks go by when I can’t get out and game because of my kid, and even when I do I shoot myself in the foot more than I care to admit (this was true of my session last Thursday–5 opens, 1 snapchat, who never added me, but I made a mistake in every single set except the last one). 

I guess the point is, I’m still learning, and that’s the point of this blog: to document what it’s like to figure this shit out. I don’t have all the answers. If you guys want to learn from super experienced guys, check out Nash or Torero or RedQuestthose guys are fucking ballers. I’m still trying to get there.

OK, so next point: it seems to me the two date model Black Dragon proposes is fucking dumb and counter productive. To be fair, his context is meeting the girl online, so that definitely makes a difference. However, if you’re not a pussy and you’re meeting girls IRL via daygame or bar/nightclub game, fuck the girl as soon as you possibly can. 

Because: 

  1. There’s no guarantee you can get her out again–girls are flaky, especially hot ones, and they have lots of options. Assuming you’ll get a second or third date is a gamble, even if you do everything right (see above). This is happening now with Princess, who’s disappeared after a second date that was very good, other than the fact we didn’t fuck (she spent the night because she passed out–too much wine). 
  2. If she’s scared off by the fact you tried to fuck her, she’s probably not down to fuck–she either sees you as free attention or a provider, and that’s not what you want to be. On the other hand, if you go for the lay but don’t get it due to LMR/ASD, and then she comes out for a second date, she’s probably reconciled that with herself and is down to fuck.
  3. Your time is better spent running more game. I could have gotten numbers and who knows, maybe even lays on the nights I had dates with girls for the second or third time. This is why I royal flushed the Tease–because it seemed like she was more about the game and the dance than the fuck. And at the end of the day, FUCK THAT. Ain’t nobody got time for that shit. She was real hot, our second date went real well, but when she refused an invitation for a third (not necessarily a total rejection–just wasn’t free that night), I cut the cord. Smart. No more wasted time = more time to run game.

OK, so the final point of this post is to come back to something I wrote about in my last one, and I’ve touched on a bit here, which is that it’s absolutely critical to be going out regularly to get new leads if you want abundance.

Women come and go. They are random and ethereal. They are both super flaky and super passive. And what all of this means is that if a player wants to be having regular sex, he has to be going out on the regular and running game, whether day game, night game, social circle, or I guess swiping on Tinder (NOTE: I DO NOT ADVISE THIS AS A GOOD STRATEGY BECAUSE OF THE LACK OF QUALITY, NOR AS A MEANS OF BECOMING A BETTER MAN).

It’s something I’ve not done enough of recently and even though I’ve gotten laid a few times and had some dates in the past few weeks, things are fizzling, and to be honest I’ve really only got a few options–one girl I can fuck once a week or so (another I can booty call, but she’s only a 6), and three girls I’m dating, although two seem like they may fall off the map for reasons that are unclear.

Keep in mind, I’ve had incredibly legitimate reasons for not being able to run game that I can’t get into too much because I don’t want to DOX myself, but let’s just say I’ve been very busying working on my business and I’ve had my kid a bunch of weekends in a row as well…

All of which is good. I love my son more than I’ll ever love a woman, and if I can get my business going, I can quit my normal job and I’ll have way more time and money to dedicate to game, travel, and enjoying my life.

But goddamn do I miss being able to go out and run dedicated game–especially daygame. I’m telling you guys, once you get out there and do it and get over the AA, it’s thrilling and addicting, because you realize that IT WORKS–ESPECIALLY ON HOT, YOUNG WOMEN.

Good luck out there fellas.

2 thoughts

  1. Sounds like you have got the feel of what works. Good summary.

    When you mention the 27+ type, one woman always pops up in my mind. I met her at a dance event where she pretty much clung to me as the evening wore on. Good looking, solid 8, 30ish. On that night or maybe the next week we left the venue and went to my favorite dimly lit corner bench table in a bistro that serves desserts and fancy cocktails to have chocolate torte and port. On the way we dallied on the pier to make out. She mentioned something about having perpetually cold feet when going to bed and liking to use her partner to warm them. She was not inexperienced.
    After desert we were walking back to her car and she slowed her walk. It was at that moment where she was faced with deciding how she would handle the logistical issue – does she drop me off at my truck and say goodnight or invite me to her place or such. She announced “You might be surprised to know I’m really quite conservative.” “Oh really,” I said “What are you trying to conserve?”
    At that moment the bubble had burst and it ended. We talked for a while, tried making out some more, I walked about 2 miles back to my own vehicle and didn’t take a number or a last name. I might have been interested in an actual relationship with her; up to that moment I liked her. But I couldn’t like her or even be attracted to her the moment I thought she might not be straightforward and drama free.

    Patrice Oneal talked about his policy on older girls, 29+… “If a girl is 20, I will wait…. For a 29 year old… one date. Maybe two, then you better start rollin them old drawers down…”

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  2. Slightly different perspective re: first date sex:

    1. When you meet someone online, you cannot gauge the chemistry, smell, etc. There really is a higher disconnect compared to meeting women in real life. So the first date for an online match for me is establishing chemistry, DNA compatibility, etc. Sometimes it goes well, sometimes not. I got a handjob in a restaurant on a first date because the chemistry was there from the first moment.

    2. In real life, when you meet that girl you have already done that chemistry and DNA assessment. The last four girls I have met in real life I have fucked on the first date.

    3. The benefits of first date sex is that you can build chemistry and compatibility from there. The drawback is that some women will retreat into themselves and start to doubt why they had sex so quickly.

    4. I’ve tried to get a few girls out on second dates even when the first dates went well – it’s not that easy. It’s a conundrum – should I have pulled the trigger on the first date to establish myself? Or would I have received blowback when she starts doubting why she had fast sex?

    Either way, women struggle with this dance as well although I would suggest female psychology is simply more confusing after first date sex. On average I’d suggest a man would prefer repeat sex with a girl than have to start afresh, whereas girls can pull on the handbrake psychologically due to “other reasons”.

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