Lately I’ve been getting way more IOI’s from women, and I’ve been trying to figure out why, because not a whole lot, materially, has changed.
I’m fairly fit, tall, and muscular (fucking lift and stop eating carbs–there’s really no excuse at this point)–but not good looking enough to match hot chicks with any regularity on SOD (swipe/online dating). And though I’ve been monk moding my diet and fitness for awhile, I’ve only lost a few pounds (off-set with gaining some muscle) and I’m not much more defined than before. Plus most of the time I have my shirt on so there’s only so much that’s going to matter anyway.
And yet, I’m getting way more attention from girls than even a few months ago–like this past weekend, several chicks did a double take when I took my kid to the pool (again, in good shape, but not cut like some guys are)… which is when I realized it wasn’t about my physical appearance alone.
The only physical change or actionable thing (other than lifting and being in good shape) might be eye contact, which is that I don’t look away from attractive women anymore–I look right at them. Not in a creepy way, but in a “I would fuck you into oblivion” kind of way.
But it seems there’s more of an aura, or feeling, top guys throw off, and chicks somehow realize/know, deep in her hind brain: that guy fucks.
To me this explains a lot:
- Why some day gamers have really bad approach to lay ratios and some have incredibly good ones (God bless you Roy Walker, you son of a bitch).
- Why certain guys–especially naturals–just seem to get hot chicks without trying aka the Chad effect.
- Why girls–when they do chase (because most often they don’t, I would argue)–chase and chase fucking hard.
- And finally, why some guys, no matter how much game they study or run, never really progress much with women.
Because somehow chicks know which guys fuck, and which ones don’t. I don’t know how they know it, but somehow they do. Obviously, a lot of it has to do with confidence, charisma, etc., but that all comes with good experiences.
There’s a book about this called The Winner Effect. I haven’t read it yet, but the basic premise is that people who experience success usually see that success multiplied, because they’re more willing to take risks, try new things, put themselves out there, etc.
Anyway, this probably comes off as somewhat braggadocious, but that’s not why I’m writing this post–I mean for fucks sake, I don’t make a secret of the fact I sleep with a lot of chicks: I have a blog about it. I bring it up because I’m curious how many other guys after about a year (or more) in the game experience something similar, and also to tell guys new to game, that yes, it gets better, and easier, as you have more success.
But I also want to note that for this same reason, it’s important guys don’t get down on themselves when girls blow you out, don’t text back, flake on dates, or ghost at any point in time–all of that shit is going to happen. A fucking lot. I got rejected a lot when I first started, and I still do.
And I’ll be honest: it pissed me off at first. It made me feel shitty, unworthy–all those things. But now, I don’t even notice it.
A girl flakes on a date.
A girl doesn’t give me the number.
“Have a great one!” NEXT.
A plate drops.
Awesome, more room on my own. NEXT.
So the point of knowing that girls know that guy fucks, isn’t to tell guys they can fake it–because I don’t think you can. However, what you can do is focus on the positive, not the negative, and in so doing, you give off more off that DGAF/That Guy Fucks aura, and girls pick up on that.
So keep going fellas. Forget the negative. Embrace the positive. Oh, and FUCKING LIFT!!!