So…let me just say this to start: for sleeping with and retaining girls, it seems the best method is a two-date model.
First date, you keep it cool, go for an hour or so, get a drink or coffee, and you don’t even kiss the girl. Second date, you invite her to your place and fuck her. It works. Smarter and better players than me know this and have tried to teach me.
But alas, it’s just not my game.
I had a hard time understanding that until this morning (or perhaps two mornings ago, depending on when you’re reading this), driving back after first date sex with this Persian girl I day gamed last week.
And it occurred to me–what Tom Torero and Rollo were really talking about with the dual mating strategy.
You see, chicks–whether they realize it or not–put you in one of two categories: lover, or provider. I am definitely NOT the provider. At least, I do everything possible not to put myself in that category. And if I place myself in the chick’s shoes, it makes sense: you have a first date with a player…and he doesn’t make sex happen? Doesn’t try to make out with you? Doesn’t get physical? Doesn’t push the envelope?
Now she’s confused. Is this guy the lover–is he going to put her in a position where, “sex just happens?” If not…is it going to happen on the second date? Does this guy want a relationship? Can this guy make sex happen?
Because the girl mostly knows that she can’t, or more likely, doesn’t want to–and don’t misunderstand, she wants to have sex, but lacks the ability to make it happen.
Point is, if she sees you as the lover, she wants sex–she doesn’t think this consciously, but all the same, that’s why she’s out. For fun and entertainment, but mostly because she WANTS YOU TO SEDUCE HER.
It should also be noted that the two-date model is predicated on SOD game–you match with a chick, have a first date to show her you’re the lover type, and then you seal it on date two. But even then, one of the best players I know, Magnum, who goes into dates with the two date plan, will still pull for first date sex about half the time. Actually more, if I’m remembering our last conversation.
Anyway, what I’m trying to say here is that if you can pull on the first date, there’s no reason not to try. Sure, it’s possible this chick will feel slutty after the fact, and decide not to see me again for that reason, or because she sees me as a player–but it’s also possible that if you don’t pull on the first date, you won’t get a second chance.
Also, going back through my posts and thinking about the girls I’ve pulled on the first date over the past three years, I think I’ve given guys the wrong impression that most of them don’t come back. Most of the girls who actually live here, I do in fact see again and bang a second or third time. A few don’t, but the typical reason I don’t see a girl again after first date sex is that she’s from out of town.
My real problem is that I can be extremely charming at times, and then a complete asshole, and if you do this consistently, girls generally have one of three reactions:
- A) They are turned off after a short time, sometimes even the first date (as much as I pull on first dates, I also fail on many…because I pull).
- B) She falls in love and wants monogamy, or
- C) Finds that I’m still too boring–she needs less charm, more push and drama and drugs and excitement.
And typically, all end up leaving after a short time.
A) is over it–maybe we have sex, but after two or three rounds, she sees me for what I am: a male Thot. Plenty more where that came from if you’re young and hot.
There was a chick I had two dates with in December 2018, when I was just on an absolute tear, before I started the blog.
Anyway, fucked her on the first date. A week later, she came over for dinner and we had sex again.
Then, she was out.
Tried to shame me for being a player, said she didn’t want to be my “Wednesday girl” (she would’ve been a good Wednesday girl), wouldn’t come out anymore.
B) I push away, as I have not yet met a woman who’s worthy of monogamy since my ex-wife (and turns out she wasn’t worth it either). Keto girl and Yoga girl and Cam Girl and Bumble girl 1.0 fall in this category. Wanted commitment, and like Al Bundy, I said, “no ma’am.”
C) leaves of her own accord. Again, we often have sex, because I can spike enough on the first date, but ultimately I’m not exciting enough: we aren’t doing coke more than two nights a week in the clubs, going to enough concerts, staying up til 3am every night, having loud verbal arguments every 36 hours–you know, that sort of thing.
Yeah, say it with me everyone: Socks. My oneitis. So hot. Looks a little like this chick, Tracee, from Sopranos.
BTW, I hope you’ll forgive me for not posting photos, but out of respect of the privacy for the women, as well as my own security–especially given how dumb society is getting about stuff–well, it is what it is.
Anyway, let’s get to the beautiful seduction…
Have routines to fall back on.
Every great athlete has routines. Every great businessman. So should every great player.
And the reason is that routines make all the other difficult decisions easier. So, for example, some people essentially wear the same outfit everyday, or at least the same colors. So getting dressed in the morning isn’t a decision point. Pants, shirt, jacket. And for many people–especially the most successful ones–neither is breakfast or a lot of the rest of their day. There’s a clear schedule. An agenda.
They eat at the same time. Work out at the same time. Have meetings at the same times.
And I’m here to tell you that your dates–especially first dates–shouldn’t be any different.
Have some reliable venues and don’t stray.
Where I live now, if I’m planning to have her come back to mine, there are two bars nearby where we can meet. One is better for cocktails/wine, the other is a tap house.
If you’re meeting her near her house (never meet in the middle–no logistics), you should have a few venues you know in each neighborhood of your city you can suggest, so it’s possible she can invite you back to hers–or you can invite yourself, baller.
These should always be the same places if possible, and they should have a good set up for seduction: hip, dark, casual, private.
Another routine I have is that sometime 2-3 hours before the date, I text her–and it’s always the same ping. With the chick last night her name is in the text, but here’s the same text from the Polish girl from Bumble I slept with earlier in the year–she also has a great reaction:
Make fun all you want, but chicks eat that up. Feel free to steal it.
Sets a fun, flirty tone for the date, establishes that it’s casual, and also lets you know if she’s going to flake. She gets until a half hour before the date, and if I don’t hear by then, I figure out something else to do. When night game was still in play, I would go out and try to get a number or two.
I should mention, that’s my routine–if you have something different that works for you, perfect. But I do recommend guys have some sort of pre-date text confirmation ping that lets you know if the date’s actually happening. Because flakes happen more than a lot of guys want to admit, and time is valuable.
Anyway, when she shows up, I smile and hug her–but Riv, I’ve been listening–either vertically or slightly pulling her back so she’s leaning in to me. Then, just as in day game, I say what I see, usually some combination of telling her she’s sexy with a tease.
Next, after we order drinks and sit down, I incorporate a few of the following during the first hour or so, interspersed with regular conversation:
- Favorite movies/shows
- Questions game
- Future Projection
- The Cube
- Tattoos, Rings, Jewelry (if she has them–and if you do, she’ll almost always ask)
I realize I now need to write longer descriptions of those things, but I’m not going to do that today. I’ve linked to some resources I could find on them for now.
I should mention, during a first date–or really, ever with a chick you want to fuck–there are also things that you shouldn’t talk about. Ever:
- Anger or violence.
- Fishing or hunting–unless she brings it up.
- Other chicks–unless she brings it up. A little relationship talk is fine, some guys probably do it better than me, but I’ve found that if the conversation turns to ex’s, it’s just a drag.
- Regular drinking or drug use–unless she invites you into the bathroom to do coke.
Then, sometime during the first hour I’m going to try to kiss her, unless I’m getting massive signs that she’s not into me–and if that’s the case, I cut it at the first drink (btw, I’m now either having soda water with lime or kombucha instead of booze). If she hasn’t warmed up over the first hour, the second probably won’t matter much either.
If the kiss goes well, then you’re in good shape–just keep doing the same stuff that’s worked, teasing her, and continuing to physically escalate.
Last night’s +1 date, seduction, escalation.
So last night, here’s my routine:
- Meeting near her place–bar near where I used to live I’ve pulled from before. See you at 8:15 black dress text, at 6.
- Hugged, ordered drinks.
- Talked about tattoos, travel and nature, in which I did some future progression about a weekend escape to the mountains, camping and sharing a tent.
- She was leaning toward me and I used the triangular eye routine from Beckster–you look at her mouth, then up to the right eye, then over to the other, slowly–as we started talking about food. After a few minutes I could tell she wanted to kiss me, so I simply pulled her in and kissed her.
A point on that: I honestly don’t know how to tell you to kiss a girl.
You just do it.
Yes, she might not always want to kiss. But you just have to go for it and take your chances. And that happens by moving your body and hers together in some way and putting your lips on her lips. Trust me, if she’s not into it, she’ll let you know.
Understand: most girls won’t give you a blatant invitation, and even the girls who will would rather you had the balls to do it first.
So just kiss the damn girl. I don’t like saying this, but in this case: you do literally need to stop being a pussy. And know that comes from a place of love from your old buddy RPD.
Anyway, after the kiss, I just kept escalating: put my hand on her leg, around her waist when we stood up to get another drink, on the small of her back for another kiss, so on and so forth.
Now, this continued, but because of COVID, a lot of places close early, and there’s still a curfew I think? I’m not 100% sure, but I said there was, and I suggested we get some food and go back to her place. Boom.
From there it was honestly very simple: she said she had food at her place (example of good girl game), so we just walked there, put on a movie, ate some food–cheese and crackers and salami; unfortunately no Persian food, which is goddamn delicious–on the couch and then I started making out with her. Ten minutes later carried her into the bedroom.
Notice, I’m not really making any hard decisions. I’m simply moving things forward in a logical way that can lead to sex.
She may divert us from time to time, but I keep putting us back on that path until she makes it clear it’s not going to happen–and that involves zero physical pressure.
She doesn’t want to kiss, especially if you try a second time, that’s not a good sign, and you take your foot off the gas. She doesn’t want to sit close, hold hands, isn’t touching you–these are all signals to chill.
The actual sexy sex.
OK…I think that’s it for now. Or should I describe the sex? Probably should I guess.
I carried her in bedroom and pushed her down on the bed and got on top of her. We start grinding and kissing and she pulls off my shirt. I lean back and pull it off the rest of the way, then pull her shirt up far enough to start licking her nipples (wasn’t wearing a bra–one of those tight shirts showing a bit of midriff).
Pretty quick I pull her back and take her shirt off all the way and continue to lick her nipples and gently twist them with my thumb and forefinger. She gets hot pretty quick and then we both start pulling our pants off. She asks me if I have a condom.
As it just so happens. I do 😜
We finish taking off our pants and then she kneels down and puts her mouth on my dick. This makes me super hard (one benefit of not drinking–your erection is like it was when you were 18). I think my dick is north of average, though not huge, but at that moment it feels like it is. I grab the back of her hair and start gently facefucking her, and then I just want to fuck, so I throw her back on the bed, roll on the condom and get on top of her.
Condom sex < Penis sex, but she’s pretty tight so it feels damn good and we’re both really into it and turned on, which always makes sex better. After five minutes of me going slow at first, but then strong and heavy at the end, she pushes me back and turns around, and we start going at it doggy.
She starts playing with her clit.
I think: OK, so this is how she gets off.
Here’s where you use sex talk to see how she wants it: “Do you like that big cock deep inside you or are you a naughty girl who likes to get fucked hard?”
This chick, in a shocking development, likes to get fucked hard.
She says, “I want you to pound that little pussy,” and puts her face down on the pillow, ass higher in the air, and I go to town. It takes awhile, probably like 10 minutes (do your squats and deadlifts boys), but then she finally starts saying, “oh my god, oh that feels so fucking good, oh my god–” and has her orgasm.
I like to finish on top, so I turn her back over and fuck her sorta slow and strong at first, and then I can feel that cum welling up in my dick, so I go harder and harder until I blow it into the end of the condom.
Post sex–that rare moment of honesty and happy emptiness.
A few notes of interest here that this lovely girl shared with me. And I do mean that: she was very sweet and submissive, very sexy. Probably TBH, a high 6 in terms of SMV, when the clothes come off–but definitely a girl I’m happy to fuck and spend time with.
Anyway, she said she mostly used SOD to meet guys. Her favorite app was Bumble, but she also liked OKC. She admitted to have been ghosted, post sex, a few times. Surprised she admitted that.
On the pick up, she said she loved the fact I approached and she used that word again: bold. She actually said that was the moment she knew we were going to fuck. Right as I gave her my phone to take the number.
She didn’t bite on anything when I asked if she fantasized about other girls or MFM. She said she’d thought about it, but mostly, “I just like normal fucking, as long as it’s hard.”
And going back to the whole retaining chicks thing, I think I’ll see her again. I guess she’s out of town on vacation starting Friday, until the weekend after, so it’ll be a bit. But I stayed the night and fucked her again in the morning. She made some coffee after, and before I left I told her to send me pics from her vacation.
So we’ll see.
Goddamn feels good to get a day game lay.