Sometimes there just aren’t that many fish to be caught.
A problem of location (numbers). The smart angler needs to find a new hole, river, or lake with more fish.
Sometimes the water’s too high, fast, or deep to fish effectively.
But assuming he can solve the first two problems–he’s in a place where there are lots of fish and he’s able to reach them, the fisherman’s got two other things to figure out:
What does he use as a bait, fly, or lure?
Finally, how does he show it to the fish?
This analogy applies perfectly to meeting, dating, and sleeping with beautiful women. Just like fishing, these are the four basic factors that guys should consider when thinking about game: the holy quad of meeting women. Location (numbers). Logistics. SMV (attraction). Game (presentation). If you don’t have all four of these aspects of game working in your favor, meeting, dating, and sleeping/having relationships with girls–especially lots of girls like most guys want–is going to be extremely difficult. Even if you want a long term relationship or marriage, your chances of getting that with a high quality girl goes way up when the holy quad is working in your favor.
Let’s take them individually.
Location (numbers): lots girls to choose from, good ratios, etc.
If you live somewhere there aren’t many girls (a small town or city), or where the number of men greatly exceeds the number of women (places like SF, Denver, Seattle, and post pandemic, Portland or Minneapolis that got hit hard by COVID restrictions and riots), you’re fucked.
Or not fucked, as the case may be.
Because the simple fact of the matter is that in 2021, girls are picky AF. Way more picky than they should be. Way more flaky than ever before. And much more likely to have lots of offers when it comes to both men and fun things they to do. Now, we can complain about that all we want–and Lord knows I have–but at the end of the day we’re not going to change female subculture and social dynamics.
The good news is that every problem with women can be solved by talking to more women, or what some guys call the numbers game. And honestly, too many game aware, red pill guys AREN’T playing this game. They go do a few approaches, match occasionally on the apps, and then complain they can’t get laid–but it’s like: bro, you literally talked to 10 girls in the space of two months. Of course you didn’t get laid.
So we need a location that works in our favor, both in terms of the number of girls in our metro area, as well as the number of girls we can present ourselves to overall, whether through cold approach or OLD or social media. And then the player needs to do the work of actually presenting himself to as many women as he can.
As for the first part, it may be you need to move. I do, as I wrote recently. The number of girls in my city has drastically decreased since COVID, and perhaps even worse, it’s become a city that’s hostile to hot, young, feminine women. So far I’ve done 48 approaches in July, but that’s not for lack of trying–a few days ago I walked 4.5 miles around town and only managed to find four girls worth talking to. On the plus side, that’s one thing I love about day game: at the very least you get a good walk in.
Anyway, if you’re serious about being a player and you’re thinking about moving, you’ll want to target cities that have the following characteristics:
- Large population, walkable downtown
- Lots of colleges
- Good ratio of women to men
The first is fairly obvious: bigger city = more women. Simple enough.
But I’ve come to believe the second factor is almost more important. Living in a city where there are lots of college girls has a huge advantage:
A) you can date these girls (duh), but more importantly:
B) having a lot of college girls in a metro area puts pressure on all the other women in the city. They all know there’s a large population of hot and young and highly sexual around who will fuck HQ guys, and they have to compete, which means you’ll get a population of women who are more fit, feminine, and pleasant. Indeed, if I have a choice between a big city that doesn’t have lots of colleges and a smaller city with many and/or a really big state university, I’m going to choose the latter.
Beyond that, having a good ratio of women to men is also good for obvious reasons. Now, the reality is that in most cities it’s going to be pretty close to 50:50, so even a slight skew is a big advantage. 47% men to 53% women in a city of 5 million means 30,000 more women than men. And if you really want to get in the weeds, you can look at the age of those ratios, because we’re obviously not gaming in the old folks home–so what you really want to look at are the ratios of women to men in the 18-34 year old range, because those are the women we’re most interested in targeting.
Actually, a quick aside here: In my own game, I’ve decided to stop hitting on women who appear to be 35 or older–and if she’s over 30, it’s only going to be if she’s extremely hot. The reason is that older chicks are unbelievable time wasters: they’re less likely to sleep with you and every bit as flaky as younger chicks. Are there awesome, fit, older women who aren’t like that? Sure. But in general, most are going to waste your time, especially if you’re a true player because they’ve been around long enough to see us for what we are, and even though they’re attracted, the dumb voice in her head can no longer justify sex unless it’s in service of a relationship–which ironically, prevents her from getting a relationship. And frankly, if I’m going to have a relationship I’d prefer to have a younger woman anyway.
TL;DR–living somewhere the numbers are in your favor, both in terms of population and age, is a huge advantage. If you’re in a bad location–town is too small or with a bad ratio or other bad dynamics (like a city where the mayor told police to stop enforcing the law)–it’s going to be tough sledding.
Logistics: where/how you live and the concentration of women nearby.
Logistics, simply put, are about three things:
- Housing: Do you live in an apt or house near good venues you can run dates and pull from? Is it a relatively central location in the city?
- Volume: Are there a lot of women living in the area who go out enough that you can effectively do some day and/or night game?
- Pad Allure and Preparedness: Do you have reasons for the girl to come back to your place? Is it comfortable and relatively clean? Do you have drinks and snacks? Movies, music, books, a record collection, etc.
On the first and second points, ideally, you need to be somewhere walkable, hip, and central, where there are lots of bars, restaurants, grocery stores, shops, etc. This will allow you to run dates close to where you live, which makes it easier to escalate and bring a girl back after a date–a 5 or 10 minute walk to your apartment is much more likely to succeed than a 25 minute drive back to the suburbs. Additionally, it means you can walk out the door and go talk to girls, whether day or night game.
Now look, I understand that some guys live with other people, or they live with their parents, or they live in the suburbs, and may not be able to change that in the short term. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to get girls, but it does mean it’s going to be more difficult and you need to consider things like:
- Pulling to her place.
- Renting an air bnb or hotel room.
- Having sex in public places.
- Going on vacation to places where you can be like somewhere I described above.
- Just telling her: hey, I’m currently staying with my mom, because I’m between places–remember, if you think it’s not a problem, she’s likely to think it’s a problem. And if you’re wondering if that can be done, it can be: I’ve done it (I live on my own, but I’ve pulled to my parent’s house several times when I’ve stayed with them), and so have some of my clients who used to think it was an insurmountable problem.
Ultimately, you know what I’m going to say: if this is important to you, MOVE. The advantage of living somewhere centrally located with cool stuff going on is absolutely massive when it comes to women and game–and I know, because I’ve lived in both types of places. When I lived downtown, or near downtown, in 2018-2019, it was super easy to run dates and pull, and the numbers of chicks I was able to get as a result was pretty damn amazing: in Oct 2018 alone, I had sex with four different girls, and during that period of time I don’t think I ever had a month where I didn’t sleep with at least one new girl (often 2 or 3). What a disgusting slut I am!
However, now that I live in the suburbs, things are much more difficult (COVID notwithstanding). I have to drive downtown if I want to run game, or else go to malls and stores like Target in the burbs. And when I run dates, I’m often asking the girl to drive quite a long way to go to a bar where we can walk to my place. I’ve still done OK, but it’s much more difficult and something I constantly have to work around–another reason I’ll be moving as soon as I can.
The last point on logistics is that you need to have reasons to bring a girl home, and you need to have the amenities to make her comfortable. Here’s a list of things players should have stocked every time they goes out to run game, or on date:
- A bottle each of red and white wine.
- A bottle of liquor, preferable vodka, tequila, rum, or whisky–plus mixers.
- A few beers, ciders, White Claws, etc.
- Cheese and crackers.
- Tea and/or coffee.
- Chocolate and/or ice cream.
Obviously, if you want to play around with different stuff similar to what’s described above, fine–the point is that you need to have food and drinks you can offer the girl so that she’s comfortable. You can also use this as part of the pitch, super simple: “hey, I have a nice bottle of wine at my place and some cheese and crackers. Let’s go back and watch a movie/listen to music/look at the view.”
On the latter half of that offer: have a good place to watch movies or Netflix or YouTube–if it’s your bed, that’s totally fine, but it should be clean and comfortable. Have a good stereo set up–with the bluetooth speakers and how good they are these days you have zero excuses: you can find super cheap ones that sound really good and will connect with your phone or laptop.
If you can, pick an apartment or house that has attractive features: a view, hot tub, nice backyard, a pool, a rooftop, etc.
In terms of what your interested in, being able to play guitar, having a large, eclectic record or book collection, cool art/photography, etc., are all things that will work in your favor when you bring a girl home.
One last point: your place should be CLEAN. That doesn’t mean spotless or perfect, but generally clean. Will a girl fuck a guy she’s attracted to in a van or a dirty mattress on the floor? Yes. But she’d fuck that same guy in a nice, good smelling, tidy apartment too–understand, when guys who seemingly shouldn’t pull, pull, it’s in spite of their bad qualities, not because of them (asshole game notwithstanding).
SMV: putting yourself in the best possible physical light.
I don’t think this is really worth talking too much about–it’s certainly important, but also somewhat self-explanatory. Look as good as you possibly can:
- Eat healthy
- Don’t drink too often or do a ton of drugs.
- Get below 15% body fat (less if possible).
- Play to your strengths–if you’re ripped, wear shirts that show off your muscles; if you’re skinny, wear clothes that make you look bigger; if you’re a bigger guy (read: fat), lose weight, but in the meantime wear baggy clothes and make it look purposeful, like you don’t care; if you’re on the shorter side, wear shoes that increase height; if you’re a foreign guy or a minority, accentuate parts of your identity or culture that women find sexy, mysterious, or dangerous.
- Dress well, with a clear archetype in mind.
- Peacock to match your style and show some flair.
- Get a good haircut (if balding I recommend just shaving it), trimmed beard or goatee is an option, and otherwise maintain good hygiene.
- Smile, make direct eye contact, maintain good posture.
- Have social media accounts (f you want) that DHV.
- If your going to use dating apps, YOU HAVE TO GET PROFESSIONAL PICS.
Follow the links if you want more information on this stuff, but it’s been written about a ton. I suppose the takeaway here is that your SMV is probably the most direct influence on the quality (and quantity–the better you look, the more women will be attracted to you by an exponential factor) of women you can attract. If you’re trying to go more than +1 of your SMV, it’s going to be tough sledding unless you can get yourself to a male 7–again, chicks who are 6s think they’re 8s.
In that case (being a male 7), the 8s and 9s are possible. But if you’re a 6 who’s consistently going for 8s and 9s, you’re going to be a lonely bro. Pancake Mouse is of the firm opinion that in the modern sexual marketplace, people mostly match their SMV. For the most part, he’s right.
But, if the player maximizes the stuff I’m talking about here–and crucially: learns Game, especially cold approach–he can consistently get his looks match, and will often get girls +1 of his SMV (+2 is still tough, but possible; part of this is simply that 8s and 9s are rare).
Game: the thing that’s always in your control and will always work in your favor.
Like SMV, I’m going to keep this short.
Not because there isn’t a lot to say, but because of all the things I’ve written about above, more has been written about Game than any of the other three combined, and then some–it’s what most of the 187 posts prior to this one are about. The basic concepts are available on nearly every platform: blogs, books, videos, courses, etc. Indeed, there’s so much information out there on what “good game” is, that it can be confusing for a lot of guys.
But let’s define what game is–I like what Krauser said: game is weaponized charisma. It is a man’s wit, charm, talent, knowledge, and most of all, his intentional masculine frame and presence, singularly focused on the purpose of evoking female attraction.
It’s why, despite the dominance of OLD as the defacto way of meeting romantic partners, women will always be ill served by platforms like Tinder: because part of a man’s SMV is his GAME–his confidence, swagger, ability to banter, converse, and convey dominance and leadership. Women find these traits enormously attractive, and yet there is no way to show this through photos that is reliable for the girl. A picture is worth a thousand words? Perhaps. But those words can be made to lie–the would be Chad turns out to be a chode. The guy with the ripped abs can’t make the move and has nothing to talk about. The corporate titan with pictures of himself talking to massive crowds is overly logical and nerdy. Granted, the reality is that the reach and scope of women you can match with on the apps far exceeds the number you can approach via day game, and in some cities post COVID, day game isn’t even viable (why you should move if that’s important to you, and why even though I’m not a huge fan, it’s worth getting pro pics and using the apps if you want more leads). But the fact remains that women swipe on guys with great pictures that demonstrate high value and the qualities in men they seek, and yet a fair number of those guys show up IRL and are huge disappointments. And the good ones? They typically don’t stick around, because they’ve got a phone full of equally hot chicks DTF.
So, even if you are going to use OLD, you should know how to cold approach, know how to run dates, know how to escalate, tease, flirt, seduce, fuck, etc.
AKA learn Game.
Because even if you have all the other factors working in your favor: numbers, logistics, and SMV, the ability to seduce a woman isn’t something most guys understand, and even fewer guys are ever taught–our fathers have failed us.
Want to figure it out and do better? Hit me up and let’s go.